Ramblings from a tired Dev

You may want to skip this, blogs are cheap therapy. I am up late, should be in bed. But I just can't settle down tonight. There are times in my life when I seem caught up in my own problems or trials. I always search for the meaning in them, because I believe there is meaning in everything. But I wonder how many of those times, my efforts or heartache could be avoided or better spent if I would just use a little perspective and a lot of gratitude. How big a deal is it really? Is this really that bad? Should I really let myself feel this bad? Don't I have so much to be thankful for? Haven't we all had a pity party now and then, unfortunately I know I do.

Then I have an experience like I have had tonight. This has been a rough week, just seems there has been a lot to deal with and unfortunately I let it get me a little down. Then tonight, as I sit here taking up time on the computer wanting to wait up for Matt to get home from work, I have one of those moments that just turns it all around. Bringing my focus back to where it ought to be. A very wonderful friend of mine is going through the very worst of trials, if you asked me. Her precious 6 year old daughter is fighting a horrible battle with a brain tumor. I can't even imagine the anguish, is there anything worse as a parent? My heart just breaks for my friend and her family. Their faith has been so inspiring, just incredible.

How ridiculous I feel when I am so blessed to ever loose sight, however briefly, of that fact. I shouldn't have to be reminded. I have such a wonderful life and as tomorrow is Father's Day and Tuesday is our anniversary...9 YEARS! I just want to tell my Mattie how much I love him and thank him for all my blessings, because he is almost always responsible for the good things in my life.

I am so grateful to share this wonderful, beautiful, precious, funny, active, LOUD family with him. He is the greatest Dad and greatest husband I could have ever asked for. When I met Matt and the whirlwind of our relationship began, at moments when I would feel that things were moving too quickly, I could never deny that there was just a peace in my heart that I had never met anyone more right for me than him. What a strengthening of my testimony, because truly I could not imagine a more perfect fit than Matt is for me. I felt that the Lord must know me as an individual to bring Matt into my life. He and our marriage is everything I need. Matt knows me and loves me more than anyone on this earth and that is such a reassuring feeling. With him, all is well...perfect, dare I say.

I love you Matt and I am so grateful that you put up with all that you do. You are such a wonderful Dad and the kids adore you. You are the greatest hubby and I thank you for truly caring about me so unselfishly. I love you! I could get a lot more mushy, but we have been made fun of for that fact a lot lately and I think I should spare people a bit! Ahh...who are we kidding, you all know I am probably going to write another post on our anniversary full of mush! Something to look forward to!
Tootles,

....and Hoss, Thanks for Asking!